What does it mean when your 1:1 gets canceled

Last week a coworker reached out because they were so frustrated with their manager canceling their 1:1’s. Our conversation when a little something like this:

Me: Why is this a problem?
CW: I want to talk about my career and get feedback.
Me: Why do you think they canceled it?
CW: Because he’s busy and know that I’m great at my job.
Me: So, tell me again why it’s a problem?
CW: Because I want to talk to talk about my career and get feedback.
Me: You want to hear him say the words you already know are true? Why? If you believe they think you are doing great, why do you need them to say it?

We continued talking about what this meant and she realized she wanted a 100% guarantee on feedback and a plan to a promotion even though logically she gets there’s no such thing.

How often do you worry and stress about things because you don’t feel 100% certain about them?

What if you just decided to be 100% certain for yourself?

What if you decided you didn’t need to be 100% certain?

What if you decided your manager canceling your 1:1 means you are amazing and to keep doing what you are doing?

You get to decide whatever you want to believe so choose your beliefs on purpose.

The choice is yours so stop believing the illogical freak out in your head and start believing the reality that you are amazing.

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Lindsay Lyman Avatar

Hey, I’m Lindsay Lyman

I spent the last 11 years growing my career at one of the largest tech companies in the world. I’ve built teams, launched new products, and created my own jobs. As a certified coach, I teach people how to manage the noise in their head to feel motivated and valued at work again.

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